Dating 101 - Intro to Dating (Part 1)

Welcome to part 1 of my 4 part series on dating! Inspired by a blog from Paul, I have decided to tell you everything I know about men, women, boys, girls and dating. I will try to be as unbiased as possible, but Im going to be taking up for the males here mostly.

To understand dating, we must first define:
"An engagement to go out socially with another person, often out of romantic interest".

So sayeth Lord Webster.

Before the dating process, however, lies the hardest part, getting a date. And thats what todays lesson is all about!

Ok guys, the key, is confidence. You want to come across as confident yet not cocky. To do this you must first be comfortable with yourself. If your feeling insecure or nervous about your appearance, your already dead. I would say it starts with proper groom and dress.

Lets say, in Pauls case, he knows he's going to tell a girl how he feels about her. He might want to go ahead and dress well for the occasion, something that he looks good in and feels good in. Also guys, SHOWER! Some people really stink in this world, you could look like Brad Pitt but if you smell like Arm Pitt, youve already lost, so shower. Also, some nice cologne is good to, you really wanna smell good. So lets see, so far we've learned that we want to dress and smell good, (because women are all about that superficial crap).

Ok, we're looking, smelling and feeling good, we see the girl, so whats next? Quite possibly the hardest part, the encounter, telling her how you feel, and asking her out.

Wouldnt it be great if we still lived in the old days when all you had to do was see a pretty woman and you got to LEGALLY club her over the head, pick her up, take her home and have your way with her? However, due to some poorly considered legislation, this is now illegal. So we must abandon our "hunting" instincts and settle into a more gentle approach, talking... Gross.

No matter how many times your practice in the mirror, or how many conversations you have in you head about how "its gunna go", it always seems to come out all fucked up. "Hi, um, I just wanted to say that um, I, um , your um.... what time is it?... Thanks".

If youve got something to say, say it, and be confident. And for the love of God DONT use any pick up lines... Ive actually heard a guy use one, being serious, and I was SO embarrassed for him, and just embarrassed to be a Guy in the surrounding area. Let it come from the heart... or whatever organ you use to think/feel from, and just be true. Dont be conrny or try to "create a moment", be real and ask her out, and dont stutter, remember, confidence!

Oh, and last but not least. EYE CONTACT!!! That means mainting your eyes on her eyes, not only is this more romantic and all that BS, but it lets her know that your interested in her, and not the female anatomy just south of her neck. I know its hard not to look, but come on guys, you can hold out for a little while.

Well thats all for today kiddies, join us next week when I tackle the First Dates Do's and Donts!

Thug Life Fo' Life 

Emptiness - Faith In Nothing

Ok, spirits are moderately high, but this is going to be a blog bitch session, so bear with me.

I am empty, spiritually. Ive reached a point where I cant be filled. And its not for any unknown reasons, anymore anyways, I know what the problem is, and Its me. I feel God is pouring out love, but I have my hand over my cup, wanting to see where the love flows from before I take a sip.

The bible says seek and you shall find. Ive known this my whole life. I want to seek, I want to find the truth, I want to spend time with God, but I dont. Its just so hard... Ive been a bad little boy as of late, how do you sit in front of your "father" with all this dirt on your face. Its tough.

Ive fought through the guilt, the shame of it all. Now Im just stuck in the mud. I hear all sorts of lies about stuff. I was sitting in church last night, trying to worship, and all I could think about was leaving, I cant be here until I am right, until my heart is in this.

To an extent, this is true. I dont like half-assing things. Two weeks ago I brought my roomate Teryle to church, and Ive been bugging my pothead friends to get their ass's in gear and get to church... but why? How can I sell something I dont feel, I cant believe right now. I feel like I dont belong. I do need to get right. I dont think Leaving the church is a good idea, at all, but I dont "feel" it anymore, so whats the point?

Life is tricky. Who has all the right answers? Whose advice do you take? Sometimes we only take the advice we want, especially with dating. My friend Brandi has been dating this guy on and off for years. Hes awful to her, treats her pretty bad. Her parents and friends have been telling her FOREVER he's no good, she needs to leave him, or STAY single when he dumps her again. But no, she does not listen. Time and time again, she is hurt. I dont know who she's doing now, but I should call. Sometimes we're so convinced we can make it right, we loose track of the truth surrounding, we even go so far as to lie to Ourselves, how silly is that. I guess what Im getting at, in an extremely round about way. Where do you put your trust, your faith? Someone said do NOT put faith or trust in people, they will only let you down. This is also true to an extent.

People will hurt you, its a part of life, its a part that really sucks in some cases, but hey thats life. I dont think because people have the ability to hurt you, that you should just Not trust them. How would we truly love someone without trust? How would I have such great friends like Keith, Ray and Pookey without an unquestionable trust? I dunno, I think the trick is not trusting everyone, just the people you can trust, which involves high levels of discernment.

Instead of trusting humans, we are taught to trust a God whose "always there" but isnt making any personal appearances anytime soon. Sometimes I feel like Im sitting around, forcing myself to "fall in love" with this ficticious character. Im making up the love in my head for an imaginary friend.

Now dont get me wrong, I know God is real, but is all this "lovey-dovey" personal relationship true? I dont know.... How about, instead of bitching, I do something about it, I will try my best to seek what my heart/brain needs to get out of this funk. We'll see how true this "seek and you shall find" thing really is.

Anywho, thats the dilemma.

I promise my next blogs will be happy and full of love and all that shit! Happy Easter.

P.S.- Paul, I miss you too. But not like that! :)

Don Tony, King Apple

I got the chance to work again on Monday, at Applebees. I hadnt worked there in almost a month. And I must say, it was good to be back.

Prior to my month off, my boss Dave was mad at me for getting a second job without telling him, and for sleeping through a mandatory meeting for trainers... oops. But he was happy to see me, me and the other manages caught up and joked around with eachother, it was great.

It takes me FOREVER to get comfortable with male managers, cuz I got daddy issues I guess. But Ive been through all the uncomfortable stages with these guys, and its cool.

My friends also greeted me with open arms, and a barrage of 'pick on Tony jokes, I love it. I also got to make my friends laugh, I love seeing my friends happy, and I LOVE that I have the ability to make them laugh. I heard the words "I've missed you Tony" a hundred times that day. And I dont know if its wrong or right, but I found a lot of comfort and joy in that. It was good to be missed... I guess in a sense, It was good to be "home".

Ive never really had a home, or atleast one I consider home. Home, to me, is a place where I feel comfortable, where I feel love, where I am loved for my abilities as well as my flaws, where I feel wanted, and a place I want to be... I dont know if its good or bad that I get a feeling of home from a crappy workplace, but I kinda do, I love my pothead friends...

Anywho, a piece of my shattered heart has been restored, Ive got my home back, and for that, I am happy. :)

Killing the Knights, Slaying the Dragon, Crossing the Mote and Saving the Motherfucking Princess

I heard the greatest analogy today in reference to my struggles. It involved kicking a knight in the balls as the first step in my battle. I love it.

Anywho, My life... has returned!!! Misfortune has reared its ugly head again and has begun dry-humping my leg! And I wouldnt have it any other way!

Apparently, you can only get 10 parking tickets before they just tow your shit all together. And how surprised I was leaving Starbucks (Premium coffee at competitive prices) to find my car NOT where I had parked it. I called my girlfriend, laughing, and asked for a ride. I smiled as I waited for her to arrive, its good to be back in crazyland! A $180 learning experience. Keep humping you bastard!

Im doing great, my fears are diminishing, Im happy for the most part, and Im fighting for purity in my life. First step, kick the knights in the balls... thats a bit far away tho, I dont have a sword or any armor. I go now to suit up, look out world, here I come!

R & R

Holy shit does life come at you fast. Its been light speed for the past 2 years, just crazy shit happening left and right, and I havnt gotten a chance to stop and breathe yet. The most relaxed Ive felt in over 3 years was over New Years break in Florida. I was sitting in the rocking chair on the back porch of my families house, enjoying amazing 85 degree weather. It was such an awesome feeling to be "home", with nothing to do, and for that moment, school didnt matter, finances were far away, I was just at peace... amazing feeling.

Last weekend I went to visit an old friend from high school in North Carolina, Pookey. My friend Natalia came down from Virginia as well. I got in Saturday afternoon, Pookey was sleeping, (he had worked a 24 hour shift at work) so I was all by myself for a bit, in his gameroom. And what a feeling, of having Nothing to worry about, I can be lazy and not care about anything. I played guitar for a while, then flipped on his projector screen and killed 3 foot tall zombies (Resident Evil 4, check it out!) against his wall, F'n amazing, talk about stress relief!

It was good to be lazy for a day, to not have to worry about a damn thing, to just chill. I hope I can have that again soon, probably not until spring break, oh well.